As a woman and a leadership development consultant, it’s no surprise that I am often asked about the differences in leadership between men and women. It’s always a politically charged hot-button issue that leaves little room for nuance, which is unfortunate, because the differences in gender when it comes to leadership are full of nuance. Yes, there are differences between the sexes—biologically, psychologically and otherwise that come into play in leadership style. And of course, there is no difference in ability or results in leadership between the genders. Both research and the eye-test support this. Each individual leader is unique with their own unique way of handling their job, but on average we see tendencies for each sex that bear out over time. Women tend to be more democratic and participative in their leadership, often favoring a collaborative, consensus-building approach, while men tend to favor a more autocratic and top-down approach. Female leaders often show transformational leadership, acting as role models and reinforcing desired behavior via rewards. Men tend to favor the stick over the carrot, exhibiting transactional leadership styles. I use the word “tend” because I’ve encountered leaders of both sexes who exhibit the exact opposite leadership style that is normally attributed to their gender. We are individuals first and foremost. The big question is—which leadership style is better, the style favored by females or by males? The answer…
Throw Gender Out the Window—Leadership Style is Situational
Whether you’re male or female, the success of your leadership style depends on the situation. As a family business consultant, I work on a lot of leadership development. In this work, I find that the transformative and collaborative leadership styles—often favored by women—tend to have the most success. Collaboration and consensus-building are crucial to a family business. The stakeholders include family members, not all of whom even work in the business. There are a lot of people to satisfy and a lot of variables to consider when running a family business. Who will serve in what role? What are the future plans for the business when the next generation takes over? What will the company’s legacy be? What will the family’s legacy be? There are no easy answers to these questions and no way to come to an agreement with the various stakeholders without collaboration and consensus-building. When leading a family business, you must play politician as much as CEO. A more transformational and empathetic approach are necessities for success. However, in a corporate environment, where the stock price reigns supreme and the competition is moving at the speed of light, the male-favored directive approach can be the key to survival. There’s often little time for consensus building when your competition is racing forward. But again, throw gender out the window here. Leadership skills can be learned, and I counsel leaders to develop leadership skills that match their situation. Like much else in life, it’s about using the right tool for the job.
Going Against Type
Using the right tool for the job requires learning how to use the tool. Just because a male leader might not be predisposed to collaborative leadership, doesn’t mean he can’t learn it. My leadership development work with dozens of male leaders of family businesses proves as much. I’ve worked with plenty of female leaders not predisposed to collaboration too. But in a family business, this style of leadership is the right tool for the job. Every business leader, no matter what type of company they lead, must learn the right style of leadership to be successful. Learning to lead your particular organization, even if it means going against type or personal preference, will ultimately determine your success.
Turning a Disadvantage into an Advantage
When I begin work with both male and female leaders, overcoming natural inclination towards a specific leadership style can feel difficult for them—but it’s also an advantage. When leaders are forced to learn a leadership style outside of their comfort zone, they gain the ability to “see the whole field,” so to speak. A female leader who learns to lead more transactionally will be more aware of how her directives are received by employees, allowing her to make slight adjustments to her approach that help gain the trust of her team. A male leader who learns to build-consensus will often have a good sense of when collaboration has exhausted its usefulness, and it’s time to make a decision. In the end, learning both leadership styles—and how and when to deploy them—is what makes good leaders great.
